Natty’s FIVE HORROR BADASSES

Nothing gets our attention in a horror film quite like a badass. Of course, we often find ourselves rooting for the bad guy (or girl), the random hordes of zombies, or weird objects. (Or is that just me when I watch the Evil Bong movies?) Either way, we can all agree that we love a good badass. They bleed rebellion, fight for their lives, and can easily make a good film into a great one, so…this one is for the bad asses!!!


 

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5.) Erin- YOU’RE NEXT

What makes Erin so special in the ass-kicking department, is her ability to instantly turn on her inner badass as soon as people start getting brutally murdered in her presence. As soon as the first person around her gets killed, she is all over it. Her badass instincts kick in to reveal that she is in fact quite amazing when it comes to self-defense, and also really, really good at killing the shit out of people. Placed into a situation in which people invade the home you are staying in, and slaughtering everyone around you, most people would probably run and hide (of course, after soiling themselves), but not Erin. She sticks around, tries to save whoever she can, and uses every survival technique necessary to stay alive. If you have seen this film, you know exactly what I am talking about. Her tiny frame is taking on dudes who are twice her size, and it is very epic to watch her beat someone’s head in with a meat tenderizer, destroying his face. Erin goes from sweetheart to nightmare (well, for the dudes in animal masks) in a matter of seconds, and continues to do so for the duration of the film. She proves that you can definitely fit badass into a tiny, gorgeous package…and that you shouldn’t mess with Australian women.

Shaun of the Dead 2004
4.) Shaun- SHAUN OF THE DEAD

True, a 30-something year old electronics salesman who spends way too much time with his best friend, and way too much time at the same bar might seem like the complete opposite of a badass. But throw in a zombie apocalypse and slowly but surely, we have a badass on our hands. In the beginning he goes from being completely oblivious to the undead around him, to shrieking and running around his living room when he encounters his first zombie up close, and then somehow ends up fighting the undead like it is the thing to do. I mean, he shoots his own Mom in the head! Who does that? Only someone who has no cares left, of course. He seems to have it together, at least he thinks he does with his wild plan of picking up Liz, killing Phil, saving his Mom, and having a nice cold pint till everything blows over. Although, that didn’t work out too well for him, he never gives up and goes into a rather comical survival mode, and proves he had a hidden badass inside of him the entire time. In a weird way, Shaun takes the opportunity to win back the love of his life, of course he loses his mom, best friend (kind of), Step-Father, and his favorite pub burns down…but at least he kicks enough zombie ass to win Liz back.

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3.) Leo- THE PURGE: ANARCHY

This is a fairly new film, so of course I won’t go into specifics on how much ass he kicks (which is a lot). In order to brave the streets on Purge night, you either have to be a hardcore badass, or a hardcore dumbass. Luckily, for everyone who had the misfortune of getting stuck outside on said crazy night against their will, Leo is a badass. All he really wanted was to go out and get a little revenge, and to leave everyone alone. Oh, but he decided to become a hero, and completely kicked so much purge ass…he pretty much made purge night his bitch. From the way he dresses, to his armored Dodge…he just radiates badass with everything he does. He really doesn’t need to do anything but walk around, and with just that he gives you the impression that you need to get the hell out of his way.

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2.) Nada- THEY LIVE

Don’t fret, I didn’t forget one of the biggest badasses of all time! From the minute he puts on the special alien detecting sunglasses (which make him look pretty much like the biggest badass ever), he handles it like you would expect a hardcore tough guy who is sporting an amazing mullet to handle the situation. I know if it were me, or pretty much everyone I know, we would all run away from the area with our hands up in the air. But not Nada. In fact, he is quite the role model for the badass in training. Equipped with his witty quotes (Life’s a bitch…and she’s back in heat is pretty much my mantra and it will probably be etched on my tombstone someday), and oozing an approximately zero cares in the world attitude, it is safe to say I wouldn’t want to get on his bad side. Especially if he happens to find you when he has to choose between kicking ass, and chewing bubblegum…and he’s all out of bubblegum.

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1.) Barbara- NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (Remake)

Apparently, nothing brings out the true badass in someone like the unlikely event of a zombie invasion. Depending on which version of the film you are watching, you may notice the redheaded, pixie cut version of Barbara just so happens to be a badass of epic proportions. True, in the beginning she is having a mild…ok MAJOR freak out session, which is only natural because she just realized her brother is actually Chop Top, she sees a zombie’s bare ass, and she gets in a minor auto collision because she is trying to escape being eaten alive. Yeah, I don’t know anyone who could snap out of that. Somehow, she does just fine, especially after being comforted by Candyman, and by putting boots on. Pretty much, she unlocks her full badass potential after she tries on the boots. She almost becomes a different character…she takes charge and does everything from boarding up windows, to killing zombies…and killing someone who is not really even a zombie at all, just a complete dick,..which is probably something we would all do in that situation….or is that just me? Hmm…maybe I am a badass after all.


Who are your fright fanatics’ favorite horror badasses? Sound off!!

 

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