Movie Review: COME OUT AND PLAY!!

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I’m not sure if any of you know this, but Makinov directed this film. In case you didn’t read it the first time, Makinov directed this, Oh by the way, did you know Makinov made it? If you didn’t, then TRUST ME, you will know by the end of the movie. The mysterious masked director plasters his name on this movie, like a kid vying for attention..and unfortunately good technique was not something that was also plastered into it.

A remake of the 1976 film WHO CAN KILL A CHILD?. Makinov’s COME OUT AND PLAY tells the story of a couple played like it’s sleepytime by Ebon Moss-Bachrach (THE LAKE HOUSE…I’ll just leave it at THE LAKE HOUSE) and Vinessa Shaw (THE HILLS HAVE EYES remake, LADYBUGS..don’t act like you didn’t like that movie) who are getting ready to have a baby and are on vacation. They end up stumbling upon an island that strangely is only inhabited by children, and guess what?, the kids have killed the majority of the adults and don’t take lightly to the couple appearing. Faster than you can say “completely useless slow-motion shots and really bad sound editing”, the crap hits the fan and the couple find themselves fighting for their lives, when the children come after them.
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I’m not going to lie, I REALLY wanted to like this film. I made it a point to try to tune out the insanely ridiculous approach that Makinov took, with wearing a mask at screenings, coming up with a “manifesto” and as much pretentiousness that one could swallow, and just watch it with an open mind, but I had to fight to make it through the film. It’s not shot badly per se’ but unlike WHO CAN KILL A CHILD?, COME OUT AND PLAY has really big issues with pacing, leaving you quite bored for most of the movie, and gives you probably the least amount of character development for its main characters since BIRDEMIC. It’s unfortunate, because Vinessa Shaw is usually enough to keep one emotionally attached to a film, she definitely has acting chops, but COME OUT AND PLAY under-uses her to epic proportions, and could have easily had anyone else in the role. In fact, the whole film could have been written, directed and acted by anyone else and it wouldn’t have mattered. It’s a missed opportunity, because WHO CAN KILL A CHILD? was jarring and emotionally draining at times, and all we get with COME OUT AND PLAY, are a series of loud noises and a flat as hell story. All I can hope is that the next time around, Makinov spends more time working on making an enjoyable movie as he does trying to make himself into a mysterious figure because I do think this might be the least enjoyable film that I’ve seen in quite a while.

COME OUT AND PLAY opens in select theaters on March 22nd and is currently available on iTunes and VOD.