DON’T LOOK IN THE ATTIC
I want to talk to you today about dubbing. Forget the plot. Forget the acting. Forget the cinematography. Forget all of that for now. All those elements can be masterfully executed, and it won’t matter a damn bit if the dubbing on a foreign film is ludicrously off kilter. And the dubbing is a flawless disaster in DON’T LOOK IN THE ATTIC.
Not that the plot, acting or cinematography are any gems here. There’s something about the sixth and seventh generations of a family from Turin and their “twice-accursed” villa, as one character puts it. The characters are all sleazy, most of them are generally mean, and our heroine, the one we’re supposed to be rooting for, is a bitch. Scenes of fighting and the occasional attempted rape are broken up by long, banal dialogue, and during many of them, it’s so dark, I wanted to give the cinematographer a flashlight. Even with Robert DeNiro, Laurence Olivier and Marlon Brando doing the voices, this would have been utter trash.
All that I could have forgiven, but for the dubbing. Because every dubbed male in the movie (including the one who looks astoundingly like a teenage Robbie Benson) has a voice that sounds just like Terrance and Phillip on SOUTH PARK. Ponder that for a minute. I kept expecting to see the top parts of their heads separate from their jaws as they spoke. How am I supposed to be terrorized when every male in a horror film sounds like fey Canadians?
The dubbing in this movie is so bad, I wanted to tap it on the snout with a newspaper and rub its nose in its own poo. Bad dialogue! Bad! Sit! Heel!
Avoid seeing DON’T LOOK IN THE ATTIC. Unless you and your buddies want to play drinking games that involve providing your own absurd dubbing for the dialogue. That’s the only way this movie could ever be enjoyed.
Don’t Listen to the Dubbing! But Do Support Icons of Fright and Buy Here!